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He moved to Dubai and isn't coming back

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"He moved to Dubai and isn't coming back"
Dear Lynn,

I met someone on here in July, the relationship was going very well, he worked away in Dubai and we only use to see each other on weekends when he comes home. But while he was out there we text each othe everyday, until two weeks ago he stop texting or calling. this week he came home to drop the bomb shell that he has sold his house over here and now living in Dubai. He only came to say goodbye and to wish me all the best. Lynn that as really knock my self esteem, I cant even go out now i am so shock, my son suggested i should go and see a consellor as this is affecting me deeply.. i am so confused

 Anon, 40yr old female - Posted: 16/11/2007
Lynn says.. Page: 1
Posted: 19/11/07 18:59
Hi. Sorry to hear that your relationship didn’t work. I can imagine it has been a shock to yourself esteem but there are a few things to remember: - 1. You have only known this guy for a few months 2. You were only seeing him at weekends so you don’t really know what he was like as a person as you were still in the honeymoon period 3. If he was that great he would have told you what his plans were and not ignored you for a fortnight and 4. if your son thinks things are bad enough to warrant you seeking professional help, he too is obviously upset, so not only are you letting this man upset you, you are letting him upset your son too. Now come on, you can fight these low feelings you’re having, you can find the strength inside, if not for you, then for your son. Go out with friends, pamper yourself and have some fun. Good luck
Second Opinions..
ELLE9


Joined: 16th Sep '07
Posted: 02/03/08 09:44 1 out of 1 people found this comment helpful.
It is just one of lifes little mysteries that you will never know the answer to, so don't try to work it out. Concentrate on yourself... this is not your fault and has nothing to do with who you are. Spend your time concentrating on yourself, you may actually find it helpful to see a councellor, a member of relate would have the best experience for you.... Good luck
C-PRINCESS


Joined: 28th Feb '07
Posted: 27/02/08 21:45 | Last edited: 27/02/08 21:11
The way he went about this just goes to show what kind of person he is really like,you are better off without him,he has known all the long about him selling his house and moving out there for good,and kept that from you all that time,and seeing you when he came home sorry to say was just for his convience.,and maybe even the texts were somehow company for him,i know when you really like someone,and for whatever reason it breaks up,the hurt you must be feeling,plus sometimes its the way things happen and its the shock of it all that makes it feel twice as bad ,honestly time is a healer,and you will feel better over this and meet someone who will be genuine,as this guy wasnt,Dubai is welcome to him,the sly,devious little man,please dont waste your time grieving over him,there will be plenty of guys out there who wont have a hidden agenda hidden away.goodluck x
STEVE1958

Joined: 14th Nov '07
Posted: 20/11/07 11:38
Oh I'm really sorry to hear that,But I think Lynn is right?This shouldn't be the end of your world and also there are many men out there who would like to date you including myself lol.Cheer up you gonna find someone ok.
Good luck
MARKYMARK991


Joined: 22nd Sep '07
Posted: 20/11/07 10:57 1 out of 1 people found this comment helpful.
I had a similar bomb shell dropped on me too, so I understand how you must be feeling right now. The first and foremost requirement in any relationship is honesty. He was dishonest and so that has hurt you deeply. If he was able to talk to you about his plans then it may have been different for you. You would still have the pain of loss but not the feeling of betrayal. The question I asked all the time was why? Why has she done this to me? Why did it happen to me? I did see a relationship councilor, not a life coach, and one of the first things she said was you may never know the reason why. She was right as I still don't know the reason why. Why is not now my driving force? I don't blame myself for what has happened. I couldn’t have done anything to prevent it even if I had known. So now I just get on with it as best I can. For me, at least, the counseling helped enormously. If he had just talked to you about his plans then I feel that the out come would have been very different for you. You would have had the pain of loss but not the pain of rejection. Time helps ease the pain but I do not believe it ever goes away fully. His rejection of you is not your fault in any way whatsoever. See a relationship councilor and they will give you a different way to look at things. If ever you want to talk to someone I am always here.
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