Register Now

Woke up Monday with a tickly throat which turned into a stinking cold. Gradually got worse as the weeks gone on not helped by having to stand outside with 25 3 year olds! Missing my Bean as usual when he goes. Ex seeming to take great pleasure in seeking me out and telling me what he is doing with her! So been feeling really down all week. He is feeling down today not suprising (read his diary) Love him loads but his kids need him more this week than me. He sounds so down all I want to do is hug him. Wish I could make him feel better but dont know how just keep telling him I love him dont know if that helps. Feel hopeless being so far from him just keep texting and phoning him dont know whether i am a nuisance or a help just want him to know i am thinking of him. Oh well can only go up from here?

Sunday was my Birthday and my friend came up to help me celebrate. Saturday my son took me out for a meal and paid! Bean took me out on Sunday after bringing me my fab pressie and breakfast. He took me shopping in York and I had a brilliant day. I have got to admit this is the best birthday I have had for a long time. My life is def on the up. My kids are happy and so am I.

Went to his home on Saturday and was made to feel very welcome. Sunday was good as I got to shop! Monday went to Cornwall to visit relatives was ok till had to meet 17 at once! Needless to say was gobsmacked lol. Wed discovered my car and narrow cornish roads dont mix. My little one and I enjoyed our week away and loved the Cornish welcome if not the weather. Came back and my house was still in one piece infact my teenager had tidied up and cut the lawn! Dont know what he got up to but what the heck my house is in one piece.

Well the week started well and lol seems to have gone down hill. My special friend went home and I have missed him like hell since. I had a break through with one of my foreign children he has finally decided to talk to me! I have been trying to get him to try and speak English since he started and he wouldnt. He finally spoke on Tuesday and counted to ten in perfect English. I was thrilled sad eh? Wednesday was a total cock up the Optician double booked my little one and lost my glasses! Then to finish the day I had an arguement with my mum! We have patched it up today and both apologised so I feel better today. I cant wait to drive to Dorset this weekend, then Cornwall! Dont care if it rains all week! No work! Working in a school has its ups and downs and the time off is def an up lol. Any way would like to know about the xmas party Apple so let me know. x

I want to thank Paula for her great advice and I will contact you. Saw my ex over the weekend with my new friend (lol) and he didnt look happy unlike me who is feeling great. Saw a friend yesterday who hasnt seen me since he went and she was amazed how happy I am. I know it is just me and the kids muddling through but I feel great and am enjoying life. He still finds daft reasons to wind me up but stuff him I wont get mad (well thats a lie I do just dont let him know). Looking forward to my holiday in Cornwall in just over a weeks time. I know it will be freezing but I dont care it is just great being able to please myself. The kids are happy and I dont think I have been this happy for years. Maybe I am crazy but it feels good.